Douchebags & Assclowns Blog Entries

 
Someone ought to tell Jennifer Lopez that it would be wise to shut her mouth before too much shit pours out of there.
She made an appereance on Good Morning America August 18 to discuss her preparations for the Malibu Triathlon.  She had been overheard by sources saying that she “couldn’t understand why everyone is talking […]

 
 And I wasted 30 minutes of my life.
The Hills is an absolute failuire.  Seriously, the drama is the same.  I feel like I watched 30 minutes of staring and glaring.  Asbolutely no interesting dialogue and no interesting people.  No shit Audrina and Lo don’t like one another. I knew that since the commercials started airing. 
 This […]

Hey Lindsay Lohan..
I just read your blog and it made me feel a bit weezy in my stomach.
Here’s the visual…
Whenever you mention Ali Lohan and breasts…I want to puke.  She’s a walking corpse…and here you are getting mad at the paparazzi for questioning you about her alleged implants.  Then you go on to say […]

 
It’s not surprising that Jamie Lynn’s boyfriend/baby daddy/ fiance Casey has cheated on her.
Am I supposed to feel sympathy or something?  Casey allegedly had an affair with some 28-year-old woman.  He likes his bitches old I guess. Jamie Lynn looks like a grandmother, so he must have thought she was old when he got her […]

 
Thats so effing appropriate when you have millions of children watching you on Disney.
Vanessa Hudgens and Zac Effron need to get their shit private.  Honestly, what the bloody hell are they thinking? If they’re so horny to get their freak on, just take it to the bed inside a room.  We all know they’re screwing […]

I can’t believe this is Andy Dick. This looks like some maniac pedophile waiting to steal Baby Suri from Tom’s grip.
Anywho, Andy just got his ass arrested and this the police report:
“At 0113 hours, Murrieta Police responded to call at Buffalo Wild Wings, 40484 Murrieta Hot Springs Rd., Murrieta to investigate an intoxicated male […]

Someone finally shut this bitch down.
Tila Tequila got turned down on her own show! Last night’s finale of A Shot at Love 2 was HILARIOUS.  Tila chose Kristy as her final choice but Kristy was like,”Nope, no thanks…I’m uh…confused.”  Tila stated that she keeps trying to look for love but each person who she attempts […]

Three cheers for the attention seekers.
The more I hear about Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt, the more I want to punch the producers of The Hills for giving them a slice of popularity. Curse you MTV! So Heidi has confirmed that she wants to record a Christian album. Holy shit, who the hell told you that […]

 
The grossest thing of the day is probably the pictures of Hulk Hogan rubbing his hands all over his daughter’s ass.
Wait! It’s “OKAY” just because he was applying sun tan lotion. Uhm excuse me, since when do people need sun-tan lotion on their ass…when they’re wearing a BIKINI!? Brooke responds to our response over these […]

Ahahahah! Naomi Campbell has been BANNED from Nelson Mandela’s 90th birthday concert on Friday.
BANNED! THE BITCH HAS BEEN BANNED! Thank goodness for that. At least somehow, she’s getting punished for being a bitch to the world. She actually had the audacity to wear a 46664 baseball cap. ( For those who aren’t aware of the […]

“I never thought I’d have a daughter.”- Tori Spelling.
Oh trust me Tori, we never even thought you’d get married, get a job, get your own TV reality show, or have kids. But you did it…*sigh*. So Tori sold her infant’s soul to OK! magazine had some annoying interview that is filled with joyous bullshit. […]

Ahh, this is what will be expected when Heidi finally realizes that nobody likes her.
And yet another shitty song has been released by reality celebrity, Heidi Montag. Well, its called “fashion”. I don’t really know whats so fashionable about it because it’s just more awful than anything. The vocals are all electronic so it […]

 
Here lies another example of what an idiot Linda Hogan is.
When I thought things couldn’t get any more stupider with the Hogans- they just did. On May 22 Linda decides to be awesome and call 911 because she reportedly saw Hulk Hogan outside of the house. She was “shaking” and very “scared” because she had […]

Britain is even worse when it comes to dealing
with THEIR stars and the law.
Lets imagine you assault two police officers. You’d
probably get some sort of time in jail and have to
pay a hefty amount of money. But just for kicks and
giggles- lets say you assaulted the officers…on an
airplane. Things don’t look so good for […]

NOW I’M REALLY AGGRAVATED.

Kristin Davis is visiting Israel to
do some lame photo shoot for Ahava skin
products- whatever the f*** that is. At a
news conference this dumb fool was praising
Israeli women for their natural quality, love
of fashion and “being comfortable in their
own skins.”
Uhm…just because they aren’t AMERICAN
doesn’t mean that they are going to be
insecure and not […]

 
These two idiots need to shut up and move on
with their boring ass lives.

Charlie Sheen and Denise Richards are at it..
again. How freaking surprising. Christ, this
is getting so old and boring. He had left some
disturbing messages on her answering machine and
called her a ” f****** n*****”.
We know whats going to happen. He will be classified
as […]

EWWWWWW!!!! Mario Lopez is named sexiest Bachelor
of 2008!
Who the hell was in charge of this? People
magazine obviously have THEIR people on crack for awarding
this douche to be sexiest bachelor. His stupid little pose
was to imitate the amazing Mark Wahlberg. Mario ain’t got
shit on Mark. Oh and get this- Brody Jenner came in second
place??? Why […]

 
What’s worse than a cat fight? Then again what’s hotter
than a cat fight? A bunny fight.
That’s right, according to TMZ Hugh Hefner’s primary
prostitute Holly Madison and sporty whore Kendra
Wilkinson are in a brawl. For all those scientists
out there, on a pH scale- Holly would be a an acidic 0
and Holly would be a basic 14. […]

Tila Tequila is a conceited snob who thinks
just because she’s got her own reality show
she’s the next Jesus Christ Superstar.
WTF.
Read what she told US Magazine on same-sex
marriage.
It is because of me - I definitely think [my show] has helped the movement,” she told Usmagazine.com at the Hollywood premiere of The Love Guru on Wednesday. “Before […]

‘Grey’s Anatomy’ star Isaiah Washington has been fired from the show after ugly publicity that followed when he called a co-worker a “faggot”.
Washington’s contract option was not renewed for next season, series producer ABC Television Studios said Thursday.  The May finale of “Grey’s Anatomy” opened the door for the departure of his character. Burke was […]