Katie Holmes Blog Entries

I was Hoping this was the Out-Clause – No, the Other Out-Clause…DAMNIT

Monday, November 20th, 2006

When all this hubbub happened about TomKat getting hitched at an Italian castle, I thought to myself – but how will this wedding be legal? Neither one of them are Italian citizens and/or residents. I thought maybe, just maybe, this would be the glimmer of hope for Katie. Maybe, just maybe, someone in the Scientology […]

And there You Have it – Tom and Katie…Cruise…Droids

Sunday, November 19th, 2006

Let’s be honest kids – there isn’t much going on today except…Tom and Kate Cruise. Oooh, she’s Kate now….oooh, I’m scared. Well, I know I’ve been the one saying all along that this wedding would never happen. I, of course, will now be the first one to say I was wrong and woopee now they’re […]

Tom, Katie, and Alien in a Car Crash

Friday, November 17th, 2006

Blah Blah Blah, media frenzy, blah blah blah Hollywood’s biggest beard marriage blah blah blah. Well, Tom and Katie were driving down an alley in their car and swiped a mini cooper. Of course this is being referred to as a collision for drama. Collisions don’t leave foot-long scratches. Collisions leave totaled vehicles – or […]

Suri Cruise Sees the Light of Day

Thursday, November 16th, 2006

Oh my goshness, peeps – who knew aliens could survive outside of the Scientology compound. Italy has been infected – protect yourselves!

In all seriousness, Suri Cruise looks like someone took Tom Cruise, added the femaleness of Katie Holmes, squinched him into a baby, and said – ok, be a baby and be creepy. [
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Oprah, Oscar, Oprah, Oscar

Wednesday, November 15th, 2006

I have a huge problem with the two pieces of news associated with this…piece. Both, quelle surprise, have to do with Tom Cruise and his droid bride-to-be, Katie Holmes. What else could be happening with these two, you ask? Well, oh, you just wait…because it’s shocking. FIRST – Oprah was NOT, I repeat was NOT […]

Katie Holmes Spends $3000 on Wedding Lingerie

Tuesday, November 14th, 2006

Katie McDroid Holmes spent something like $3000 on lingerie recently, most of which was supposedly for this “wedding” she’s having in Italy. Who the hayl needs $3000 worth of underwears? I mean, I don’t know what happens to her underwears, but mine get all narsty and shredded, which is why I purchase from the Vicky […]

Maybe Posh Should Tell Katie How to Get the Hayl Outta There Instead of How to Lose Some Pounds

Wednesday, November 1st, 2006

Well it seems there might be some bad blood brewing between BFFs Katie Holmes and Victoria Beckham. Quelle type de bad blood you ask? Well, it appears that Lady McSkinnyPants has been giving Carazzzeeeeee McNewScientologistZombie some un-requested tips about how to lose a few pounds before the big fake wedding day. And to make matters […]