January 18th, 2007 by DamnImCute Celebrities Blog | Stay updated and subscribe.

Top 5 Celebrity Sex Tapes of all Time

While the rest of us have boring sex (yea right, I’m near pornstar status… really) celebrity sex lives seem like they must be on overdrive. There’s a monthly celebrity sex video released, or it seems like there is at any rate, but lately it’s seemed so staged and worse yet… many of the supposed slutty footage never seems to see the light of day.

What a fucking tease!

So, in honor of the true spirit of celeb porn… here is my Top 5 Celebrity Sex Videos of all Time:

  1. Pamela Anderson and Tommy Lee’s Sex Tape: Why? Simple. A mastery of the oral arts and the winner of the unique locations award. I’m not even going to mention the size… why must everyone else?
  2. Paris Hilton Video

    Rick Solamon and Paris Hilton Sex Tape: While by no means an enthralling depiction of hard core naughtiness, what’s great about the paris hilton sex tape is that it (should have) served as a relief to the hundreds of thousands of men/boys drooling over Paris because after watching it (no, not that kind of relief) it was immediately clear that they were in fact having better sex at present. Yea, even those still pettin the pinksnake.

  3. Oh s#%@. I just realized that’s basically all the real videos that have ever been released!!! WTF?

Ok, so what’s saddest here is that there are probably 10 times more “rumored sex videos” than released ones. So, c’mon Britney throw us a bone and release the famed k-fed and britney sex tape, or perhaps Kid Rock and Stapp can man up and just release the groupie-bang?

Well, my friends at least we can look forward to a Kim Kardashian sex tape; that is so long as 2 million gets her wet. No pun intended. Oh, and if you’re not paying attention to today’s watersports news… the point was that someone is pissing in the Kim vid.


Be the First to Get the Kim Kardashian Sex Tape on DVD!




8 Responses to “Top 5 Celebrity Sex Tapes of all Time”

  1. DamnImCute Celebrities Blog Says:

    Oh, and of course how could we forget the Dustin Diamond video where he purportedly performs the ultimate disgusting maneuver? The dirty sanchez! Screeeeeeech baaaaaaaaaaaarf.

  2. Moin Says:

    send me info. about britney

  3. Jacks 3eB Says:

    that’s dirty but celebrity always wanted popularity cause they can do anythings without think……. yeah that’s true.

  4. mirchaxor Says:

    You forgot about Bam Margera and his g/f/

  5. Jersey Kid Says:

    Apparently there is an Adriana Lima sex tape floating around

  6. Mr Chelmondelay-Warner Says:

    The Abi Titmus sex tape is another one….and very much real. It is both more explicit and better quality than either of the Pam/Paris tapes. I guess you Americans kind of don’t know who she is, but she is a celebrity in England. Famous for being famous, kinda thing. I think she once tried to f*ck David Beckham. In the tape, she has a threesome…her boyfriend and a black chick. I have it, it’s great! Check torrent sites or P2P clients….it’s out there.

  7. Busted Celebrity Says:

    There is a ton of celeb tapes like you are talking about that you can download @ Http://www.BustedCelebrity.com

    Cheers!

  8. D Says:

    Rick Solamon and Paris Hilton Sex Tape: While by no means an enthralling depiction of hard core naughtiness, what’s great about the paris hilton sex tape is that it (should have) served as a relief to the hundreds of thousands of men/boys drooling over Paris because after watching it (no, not that kind of relief) it was immediately clear that they were in fact having better sex at present. Yea, even those still pettin the pinksnake.

    ‘pinksnake’. you have a pinky dick. I have a Big Brown Root and Vine. you fucking insecure little white worthless piece of shit. ‘the rest have boring sex’… you are so fucking worthless. you arent near porn status. you have no dick, and cant fuck. you make that obvious with your ridiculous article. I can make love and have as big of a dick as anyone else ever, by Gods grace.

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